Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
