Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize