we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
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