This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
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