if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
