no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
