I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
