Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Say something about gay babies.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize
