yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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