Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize