Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
I got stood up on a date. They are singing "dancing with myself" on karaoke in my honor.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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