So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
