Duck Duck Cougar?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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