he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Can't talk, ducks in the car
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
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