If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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