There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
