My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Pants are for mortals
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize