We named our party play list daddy issues
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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