I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
