She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
