I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
