bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
