They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
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