is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
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