Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
