Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I forgot how hot balto sounded
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
The nice lady at the neighborhood liquor store informs me that we have a new woman-run neighborhood sex shop. Jesus loves me and wants me to have a happy Valentine's day.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
Randomize
