My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Just cropdusted the office
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
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