i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
I FOUND THE LEGS
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
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