Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
