Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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