what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I wanna passion pit in your ass
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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