he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Randomize
