This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
