okay pat passed out under dana's car
I'm eating all of the evidence.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
