hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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