She's JV to your varsity
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I got eye-fucked by an 80 year old man wearing a cowboy hat while I was singing country. How do you think karaoke went?
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
We haven't even eaten dinner yet and she's already been asked to "take it down a notch" by the groom's mom.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
