At least make sure they are 18
Why
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
So I'm pretty sure I fucked the dept of homeland security guy on my kitchen table. No recollection of it, but there are signs.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize