he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
I wish i was in the wii world.
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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