There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
In other news, I just burned my penis
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize
