if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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