im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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