He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
