I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
