her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
