Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Let's paint friendship bongs
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
