we're blogging at a bar
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
