i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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