I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
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