She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
