so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Randomize
