it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I feel great
I just peed on a car
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
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