Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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